I'm finding it interesting lately how we all judge our lives in comparison to other people. (You do it too, don't lie). You know... the people who have the bigger house, the nicer car, the better job... it is always looking at those who have what we don't have and we become jealous, selfish, and ungrateful. I really do think this is just one of Satan's tactics to get our eyes off Christ and back on ourselves. We are inherently selfish sinners and we need to keep our eyes on Christ to keep the right perspective or else we'll keep falling back into our own selfishness. I have been thinking about this lately, because I feel like all of the sudden I am very aware of so much suffering around me... and just realizing how amazingly blessed I have been... even in the midst of wanting what I don't have.
At church, just two weeks ago an 18-year-old girl was killed in a snow-mobile accident... just heartbreaking. That same weekend, we heard of a couple who gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, only to find out that she has down syndrome and a heart defect affecting three of her chambers. She was expected to live one week and amazingly is still here three weeks later. I know of people who have been trying to get pregnant for years upon years... and have drained their bank accounts and spent thousands upon thousands of dollars on treatments without any luck. A couple that I am on the care team with at church have had three terrifying life-changing events happen in the past 7 years... in 2002 they found out that their newborn son had developmental disabilities... in 2005 they lost their three-month-old daughter in a terrifying tragic accident... and in 2007 the man of the family had an accident while swimming in the ocean and now finds himself a quadriplegic. I have no reason to complain... and every reason to rejoice. If these people who have experienced terrifying, life-changing things can still praise God for his goodness, so can I.
The amazing thing is... when you talk to these people, they will tell you about God's faithfulness and the strength that he has given them through these trials. God sees all.... knows all... and in clinging to God they find hope, peace, protection...
I feel so foolish now complaining that it has been 6 or 7 months and I want a baby NOW. But I will not lie that it is still a deep desire of mine... I will continue to pray and hope and dream. But I will not complain.
Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.
Personal prayer requests:
- Peace and patience in waiting.
- Dr.'s appointment coming up on Feb 2. Clarity and ability to make good decisions about what route to take next.
- Mom's medical issues... that she finds a surgeon to do her thyroid surgery that she is comfortable with... that her eye treatment would work and that she would be healed.