October 24, 2012

A de-cluttered heart.

I have a feeling I'm not alone in this.

Oh, how I have days where I wish the mockery of being a stay-at-home-mom, sitting on her tush eating bon-bons all day, were true.  If you are like me (or have kids like mine) there is not much sitting, much less sitting and eating done during the day.

The truth is, too many of my days begin with a "to do" list too long, and end with not near enough finished.  Sure, the basics are normally done (most days).  But, in my mind I forecast this ideal day where I should be able to accomplish all of my basic "to dos"... and tackle super-mom's "to do" list as well.  Every day.  And not only super-mom's, but all of the super moms.  Crafty super-mom.  Cooking super-mom.  Cleaning super-mom.  DIY super-mom.  Then there is scrapbooking.  Blogging.  Oh, and things like dishes, laundry, and house cleaning that needs to happen too.  You must take a shower and get dressed and get all cute every day, too.  But then, of course, at-times you get the feeling that you need to scrap all that and just play with your kids with your free time.  Because that's what good moms do, right?

Every once in awhile, the things I feel like I want to be doing gets confused with the things I should be doing.  The task God has put before me.

You see, I often have to remind myself that God didn't call me to be the ultimate crafting-cooking-scrapbooking-blogging mom.  He didn't even call me to have a clean house.  Or to make sure my kids eat vegetables every day.  So, why oh why do I get so worked up over these things?  Why do I feel like I've failed somehow if I am not all of these things?  I look at my list of things I want to accomplish and know, there is no way it is all going to fit into my day.  

Something's gotta give.

But, instead of feeling like a failure deadbeat mom, I need to remember what is called of me.  The world's demands are not God's demands.  They are a far cry.  An attempt to work and glorify yourself instead of pointing to One who deserves all the glory.

I am so often that Mom who falls into the trap of thinking that the good mom has her "to do" list all checked off, and all that with a spotless house.  I've been convicted on this matter lately.  Because sometimes I get mixed up and think my value is determined by how many things I cross off that list.  And when I try, I haven't left much time for God.  For taking the days slow with gratitude.  For making sure that my time spent is on what matters.  Spending time on what makes me come alive.

None of these things are bad, but for me this image of doing it all can easily become an idol.  So, I've started giving up some good.  Paring down my "to do" list and letting go of some things that I enjoy, but just aren't in season for me. Embracing my messy house and my un-showered hair.

Because, really, what is important?  What is the message that I am sending my kids?  That an up-to-date scrapbook and creative daily crafts determines my worth?  No.

There is so much more.
Kingdom-sized more.
Praise.
Gratitude.
Knowing Him.

That is what I'm called to.  Simply that.  If my life and my heart is too cluttered to allow this, something has to go.  If my worth is wrapped up in the world's super-mom, I've missed something big time.

I truly don't think God ever desired us to live busy and chaotic lives.  How many times has he told us to come. sit. rest. listen. be still.

Do you feel that sigh of relief?

I'm in a season of de-cluttering.  Deciding what is life-giving versus sucking-the-life-outa-me.  I know what is good for me will be different from what is good for you.  For me, I know one thing that is good in my life right now is this.  Writing.  Blogging.  Sharing life in this specific way.  I'm coming to realize more and more that I am a writer, and it is through writing that I work things out in my life.  And I've figured out that in order for this to happen, I've gotta be intentional about it.

I am planning a post soon on "giving up good", to talk about some of the good things I'm holding to more loosely to make sure I have time for the better, life-giving things.


What do you find life-giving?  What good do you need to give up?

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2 comments:

  1. Very thought-provoking and inspiring, Linds. Thank you! The idea of de-cluttering is a good approach; trimming down what is extra and unnecessary and cleansing your heart. Love it. :)

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  2. Exactly! And while we can still praise Him and thank Him, and a lot of other necessary things, while we're in the midst of our must-dos, taking the time to "be still" before Him MUST be on our list of non-negotiables. That's where we fill-up so we're not working through the next poop-trastrophy or antics of the non-listening almost 19 mo. old on an empty tank. Satan does all he can to convince us "you're ok" when we get those few moments to steal in quietness with our Savior. It will be a long time before your kids will "know" why mom was so patient and loving and peaceful and ..., but the effects begin immediately and are eternal. Love you, babe!

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