This is a dangerous journey to be on. The journey of discovering the hidden areas of our heart that need a little (or a lot) loosening. Areas that have weighed us down and kept us silent for so long, about to break free. The enemy wants none of that to happen. In bible study this past week, a friend stated that she felt like she finally had some wisdom and insight into some strongholds in her life that she wasn't aware of before. You would think that this revelation would bring some relief and freedom in and of itself, but instead she felt the opposite. The enemy was livid and she felt spiritually drained and attacked rather than enlightened. I have felt the same way. Ever since that late-night decision to blog my way through this, I've once again felt frozen. Insecure. Thoughts such as, I don't want people to think I think I know anything about this. What if I say the wrong thing. What if I share too much and people judge me. Who am I to talk about freedom, you captive, you. Who am I to say anything at all. But, freedom doesn't keep us silent. So I am going to press on. I'm praying that through this journey, the spirit would make me aware of the hidden areas in which I need freedom. The areas where pride has snuck in, or insecurity has tainted. This process of uncovering our strongholds is not easy, nor is it fun. But it is so necessary. Because remaining in captivity ruins us. It strains our relationship with the Lord, and can devastate our life on earth. It seeps into our marriages, our friendships, our ministries. But the good news? Freedom can shine even brighter in all of those areas. I know this isn't going to be easy. But I know that I am not alone in this. This is the curse, this separation. We can't help it, as this is our heritage. A voice tells us that we don't need Him. We can have it all. Know it all. Figure it out through worry or fear. That this life is all there is. I take that lie and eat of it. Time and time and time again. Of course, not always consciously, but no one is beyond captivity. Especially not me.
As we begin to confess in Bible study areas in which we know we are held captive, there is a lot of head nodding and "amens" around the room. I feel like nobody really likes me, they are just being nice. I size myself up to everyone else in the room. I'm angry all the time. The success of my day is determined by the number on the scale. I just feel like a failure. It comes down to the heart of the matter. And the heart is that, on our own, we are all prideful. We are not naturally humble. We all behave as if our world is all there is, whether by self-promoting or self-degrading. But there is so much more. Freedom is the fruit of Christ's saving work. In Beth Moore's book, “Breaking Free”, she highlights how the kings of Judah, even the most honorable, were not holy. None were incapable of misleading or immune from pride. We all need a supernatural savior to redeem us.
“We need more than a leader on our road to freedom. We need a Savior - One who keeps saving. Although we need to be saved from eternal separation from God only once, Christ continues His saving work in us for the rest of our lives.”
We are works in progress. We are not supposed to have arrived. We are not supposed to be perfect in this world, but God is continuing this work even still. Praise the Lord, the secret of Christ has been revealed to us. We know where our hope lies. If you are like me, even this simple truth has a weightless air about it. God is doing this work, it is not my works. And he cares enough to set me free. He cares more about my freedom than I do. This is a battle for my freedom, and I know how it ends. So, don't lose heart. I am not alone in this battle for freedom from strongholds. Neither are you. He is the reason we are on this journey in the first place. And he will see us to the end. This is day 2 of a 31 day series on "Finding Freedom". Check here for more posts in this series.