It's leukemia.

*reposted from the original facebook posts

It’s been a hard day. We learned that Isaac has more cancer cells in his bone marrow than we expected. This changes his diagnosis from lymphoma to leukemia. He has B-ALL leukemia to be exact. This is the most common cancer diagnosis in children. It doesn’t change a lot in terms of treatment or prognosis. It does mean more tests for him though. I think his lymph nodes flared up just in time to tell us something was wrong. In terms of bone marrow, it seems we caught this fairly early still. His labs still look great, so this was kind of a surprise.

It’s hard to see your kid go through all of this. And I don’t even know the half of it yet. But it’s not hard to be here by his side for it all. He’s still the same amazing boy he always was. Loving him through this is the easiest part and it’s my joy. I’d do anything if it meant seeing him conquer this thing and get better. I have no doubt he will.

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He got his first chemo this afternoon. It kind of choked me up, though it was quite uneventful. A one-minute push drug and done. We haven’t seen any ill side effects yet, but it is still early. But we’re praying he’d be spared of those. Torch the cancer, spare the child.

We also got the good news that there was no leukemia found in his spinal fluid! Yay!! It would have been a different level of treatment had it been there, so we’re thankful he remains low risk. His labs are still awesome. Sometimes all this seems like a dream because he seems so healthy.... minus the massive lymph node in his neck. I have to keep reminding myself that while this treatment is awful, it is also saving his life. I’m so thankful for all the testing done and that we live in a time where there is a 98% remission statistic. We anticipate his cure. The road there will be long and already, this has changed us deeply. But God has met us. He will continue to.

We are bone tired. I’m not sure I’ve ever been so tired and I’ve had 3 babies and an adoption halfway across the world. The emotional exhaustion of all of this is unmatched. So. I’m going to bed. I know I said I’d do a care page. Soon.

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“Cancer” has become a part of our regular vocabulary. And when that happens, everything normal stops and suddenly everything spins on a dime to focus on this one thing. It’s impossible not to have whiplash.

Every food, every commitment, every outing... now through the lens of cancer.

I’m thankful that our lifestyle thus far will make some things easier. Isaac is already homeschooled, so while he’ll miss coop, we have already been on break for over a month. I have made similar dietary changes to deal with leaky gut and inflammation to the ones I’ll be having Isaac make. Healing with food and detox and essential oils is familiar ground to me. I’ve found some resources to help me learn how to pair this with chemo. Both to help him heal and support his body during this rigorous protocol.

Chemo started and was very uneventful. We haven’t really seen any side effects of it, but I know as chemo builds up in his body, that will change. We do feel like side effects from the steroids have begun. The massive appetite and toddler-esque mood swings from our usually super chill boy. Jordan and I just catch each other’s eye as if to say, “there it is.” But having a two-year-old and three boys, rolling with the punches with cranky behavior isn’t as hard as it once was. Plus, he’s cute when he’s mad.

It seems weird to be devastated and thankful all at the same time. But I simply am. Most people will never experience the outpouring of love from their community that we have. Cards and gifts and messages. We are being held up when our own arms feel too weary. We’re so loved. Isaac told me tonight that he talks to God every night and asks him to heal what’s not right in his body. He then said his heart is going to burst it’s so full of love. Followed by the statement that he sometimes wants to eat Naomi she’s so cute. Yes and amen.